The Infinite Scroll

Although a week and a half late, I've decided today that I am giving up scrolling through my phone for Lent. I sort of promised this to myself on Ash Wednesday, but failed quickly because I hadn't put any specific rules in place. So let's be specific - here's some behavior that needs to stop:

• Flipping through news sites like CNN, Washington Post, Fox News to check headlines when the day's news doesn't really affect me, and the news that does affect me would have been told to me by someone else anyways. 
• Reading articles about politics, technology and sports just because I can't think of anything more productive to do at that moment, or worse, precisely because I know of something more productive I should be doing.
• Checking my email on my phone, not because I'm expecting something specific, but because of a vague sense of anticipation.
• Watching youtube videos like SNL skits, funny clips, etc. for light entertainment.
• Scrolling through my facebook newsfeed to see what other people are doing.

In fact, there isn't a need to do any of these things on my phone, even if I considered them to be productive habits. For example, if I wanted to answer emails and clean up my inbox, I could take out my computer and do that more efficiently. Using my phone is just a lazier, more passive, way that leads to other distractions.

When we let our phones control our actions implicitly, we lose much more than just the time wasted. Humans are not great multitaskers, and switching context is an expensive action. Every time you change the context of what you are doing, you lose focus. Have you ever noticed that a 30 minute task (let's say writing an email) takes an hour and a half with just a few small distractions? This is because it can take substantial energy to find your place in that email and regain your train of thought.

There is something else too, that I've been trying to put my finger on. When I'm scrolling through my phone, I tend to switch context so often that nothing get's resolved. After half an hour or so, I usually end up with some half read emails and other uncompleted tasks. It's like a garbage build up. In my mind there is this building sense of things left undone, and as time passes, it just becomes a vague anxiety that seeps into everything I do. It's subtle, and it sometimes takes me days to sense it, but when I do, I realize how much these distractions are affecting my confidence and well being. 

So what are some safe things to do on the phone? I'd say maps, weather, texting, calling and taking notes are safe. These are all actions that are done with purpose and are generally completed without straying. When I look up directions for going to a friend's house, I don't find myself scrolling through a map of the USA for 20 minutes. I get the directions and I go. When I want to call my Mom, I don't suddenly have the itch to call my whole family too...

I'm going to keep using these, and I will keep my smartphone with me. But I'm going to shut off WIFI and cell data to my email and my browser - that way, I'm faced with the conscious choice to abandon my lenten promise if I ever have the itch to scroll. 

2018 Goals

2017 was the most eventful year of my life so far. I proposed to my girlfriend of 3 years and married her(!!), took a 2 week honeymoon to southern Italy, graduated with a masters in Applied Mathematics, paid off all school and car debt, moved out of my parents’ house and left my job of 4 years to start a career in Software Development.

In a dramatic change, I hit almost all of my 2017 goals. I have a habit of being way too ambitious with my goals, so I sort of dialed it back last year. The one exception will be obvious to readers of this blog - I failed to write!

Per tradition, Greg’s goals can be found here. Mine follow below.

Write

Essays, technical documents, personal notes, anything really. I find writing to be very difficult, mostly because everything I write tends to sound really stupid initially, and only less stupid once I publish. But I also consider it important as it’s the best (and maybe only way) to formalize thinking.

Get Finances in Order

Being recently married means that the whole money thing has become much more real all of the sudden. Now is the time for me to understand how to work towards financial security for my family, especially before the hustle and bustle of kids comes along. This means finally understanding investment, 401Ks, taxes, etc.

Stay In Shape

I often put down lofty fitness goals. This year, I just want to make sure I don’t fall off the wagon, so I am going to set my goal at an average of 4 workouts per week. I expect I will do some races, and I kind of want to learn to swim, but for now the important thing is to stay active.

Learn Piano

I have this on my goals every year. It may seem trivial, but I think it’s important for a few reasons:

• Music can keep you sharp mentally, and it’s something you can do into old age
• You can pass it along to children
• There is a lot of beautiful music, and playing is a new way to enjoy it

Unfortunately, I tend to fail at this goal miserably. In the long run, I want to be able to play many of my favorite classical pieces. It’s less clear what to do in the short run. In past years, I have focused on learning to play a certain number of songs within a year, but without the necessary foundations, each song took me way too long to learn.

I’ve resigned myself to two conclusions - I need to learn to sight read, and I won’t be able to do that on my own. Last year, I started lessons with an instructor for 30 minutes every two weeks. Progress has been slow, but incremental. I’m hoping it’s like math - if I master basic arithmetic now, then I’ll be doing calculus in a few years.

Learn about Technology

Let’s face it. Technology is taking over every segment of our lives. Although it can be a force for good, that’s often not the case. Sometimes, when I’m overwhelmed by the pace of change in the world, I wish it was possible to just look away and plead ignorance. Unfortunately, the pervasiveness of technology makes this risky, especially for those in a technical profession. It’s important to understand and control this force rather than the alternative. There are many ways to do this, and the level of rigor required differs based on the individual. Most people can get away with understanding the basic risks of technology and being scrupulous in their choice of tools, but I probably need to embrace a deeper relationship at this point.

There are three areas I’d like to address:

1. Learn about core technology. For me, this means a more fundamental understanding of computers, cybersecurity and the internet. I think the best way to learn something new is to employ a combination of action and reflection (I’m hoping to write more on this later), so here are some of the “actions” I’m considering this year in order of importance:
• Launch my own web app
• Contribute to open source
• Do a kaggle competition
• Make something cool with a RapsberryPi
2. Reflect more on my relationship with technology. Hopefully this manifests itself in some new blog posts.
3. Reduce mindless screen time. Right now, I watch too much TV out of laziness, and I unconsciously scroll through my phone out of anxiousness. Both can be bad habits, which, as they grow, can have increasing control over moods and actions.

Be Present

Last year really taught me the importance of spending quality time with others. Too often, I find myself distracted or anxious in social situations. I need to calm down and learn to listen and enjoy company without agenda. Part of the problem is that I’ve always been a daydreamer, and find it easier to observe rather than “participate”. I have been doing better over the last few years but have a long way to go.